The Canadian Sportsman
Know What I Hate?
Back To Know What I Hate?October 23, 2009
You might be surprised to find out that I live in a small town. I like it that way, not having to be in a big hurry all the time. I didn't work my whole life so that I have to rush around now that I'm retired.
I've never lived in a place where there was public transit and I don't intend to. I do my own thing on my own schedule and my 1987 Mercury Grand Marquis still purrs like a kitten. I like my highways with two lanes and my speed limit at 80 and that's why I hate it when racing switches back to the big city at Woodbine Racetrack from the relative tranquility of Mohawk.
If I want to see my favourite horses race in person in the fall and winter at Woodbine, I have to take that deathtrap highway to get there.
Now I was born during WWII so I was too young to fight overseas. I managed to avoid polio in my youth. I was lucky enough to marry a good woman and have kids that didn't turn out to be doped-up, vote-wasting hippies. So why would I want to risk it all by taking the 401 to get to Woodbine in Toronto?
I love watching the races live, but not if it means I have to share the road with crazy people in their sports cars, talking on their cordless phones and cutting in and out around me like a bunch of drunken tailors. [Yes, Bernie, I meant 'tailors' not 'sailors'. Your job is to type, not to edit.]
Sorry about that. My wife, who helps me on the computer, didn't think that I knew the difference between a 'tailor', whose job is to sew and scissors menswear, and a 'sailor', a person who navigates waterborne vessels. Don't worry, that's all cleared up now.
Anyway, I'll be taking my chances this weekend, because I never miss the Breeders Crown when it's up here in Canada.
Maybe you'll see me there, if the phone-talking-speedster-tailors don't get me first.
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